The days pass by me and it feels like I can see them sitting since March 16 itself.
Still things have changed. I cut my hair, adopted a dog, and as if in the blink of an eye, you were thousands of miles away from me, taking a piece of my happiness with you.
The good thing about this one is that it is divided into small irregular pieces that make me smile (like knowing that sooner or later you will come back to me), but sometimes I wish they were just the opposite.
Sometimes I wish my happiness were equal gallons easily refilled with my mother's laughter, conversations with my brother, and morning walks with my dog.
However, I have the longing to see my dad again, to travel to the island furthest from home and take a photo that I never imagined, to read stories with the admiration of words that have the magic of traveling through time, to eventually being able to do the same, to return at least half to my parents of everything they have given me, to grow old with my dog, and to plant another kiss along the way.
Sometimes, I would simply like smaller desires.
There are nights when I'm dying of sleep because it's the same dreams that I see with open eyes that don't let me sleep.
And I don't blame people with aspirations different from mine because conformity is as relative as success and I'm nobody to judge it. It's just that now I understand the joy behind the naivety and sometimes I miss it. Sometimes I envy her.
The days pass above me like the northern lights, every so often bringing a new color that promises nothing different from the previous one. But I have changed. And although everything feels slower, one of the hundreds of irregular pieces that make me happy, tells me that the river water continues to flow, and smiles at me when I realize that no human bathes in the same river twice.
Because of this, I have learned to give a more equitable weight to my pieces of happiness, and that there will be someone who can take them away from me and I won't be able to do anything about it.
I have learned to see my happiness as the garden I water daily. And having such different plants, it is normal that some take a while to bloom.
